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Hibernation in the Aspen Core

The bears have already gone to sleep for the Winter.  The social vampires are just starting to arrive.  25 ski days into the ski season and I already need a rest.   The storm known as Christmas in Aspen is on the horizon.  The billionaires are about to descend upon our little town in their fleet of private jets bringing big city problems and their entourages and hanger's on with them.   It's cougar season in Aspen.

It's a fact of life in Fat City. 

"No Construction".rules in effect.The S & P is at all time highs.  Bonuses on Wall St. are looking fat and phat.  Real Estate is back.  Business is good. Let's splurge this year...we deserve it.

Aspen has many faces.  The Christmas holidays is one of them.  Aspen is wearing it's best party dress, but it doesn't always look good at the end of the night. The town is fully merchandised.  The pop-up shops are finally ready to go.  The "no construction" rule is in effect.  I met a guy in a plush fur coat and asked him " you here for the holidays?"  he replied, "hell no, ho, you know i'm here fo snow polo".

For most locals, it's time to make bank.

In prep for the next two weeks I needed to touch base with reality, to see how the real people live.

This morning  my body ached and my head ached. When I get like that...in a funk...I know what to do. I need to balance my chi.   I need to vape.  That's right, I drove 40 miles straight down to Glenwood Springs and the real world.   I passed Wal-Mart, McDonalds and Taco Bell.   I didn't stop until I got to the Yampah Vapor Caves.  The Vapor Caves are pretty grungy.  The locker room is smaller than the Gondola.   The stairs that lead deep down into the earth are slippery and well worn.  The caves themselves are dark and smelly with marble slab benches.  Natural mineral hot springs run through the caves with the water at 125 degrees. The temperature in the caves themselves tops out at 112 degrees. White men have been imbibing the goodness of the Vapor Caves for 120 years.  The Indians took vapors for generations before that.  I'm not sure if it's the science (34 minerals) or magic or all up in my head...but a session in the vapor caves always make me feel good.  Pouring the scorching hot water on my knees always loosens me up.  Crazy.  Today was perfect...I had the place to myself.  A little schvitz and everything always seems OK again.  

A trip quick to Target and lunch at Restaurant Nepal, a stop in El Jebel just in time for Anchorman 2....and I was back to my fun-loving, lap-skiing self.  A day off is good for the head.

120 years of Vapors can't be wrong.So bring on Snow Polo...bring on AAM's Freestyle fur fest. Park your Ferarri on the sidewalk?  See what I care?  Stare at your screen, buy-out the bar,  take my skis by mistake, wear your fur hat and fur coat and fur boots and LuLu pants. Act like you own the place. It's all good.  I can handle any drama that the Christmas crowd has to offer.  I'm gonna rip a few laps, take a few pix,  go to a few parties...what ev's? bro.

This may sound funny coming from AspenSpin...but I'm trying to go low key this holiday season.  If you see me out there...gimme a hug.

A dog (not my dog) runs free on the turf of Snow Polo Stadium (which includes a big screen) at Wagner park.

 It's grungy... and hot as f*#K...but it feels so good in the Vapor Caves. Highly recommended.
Namaste...please pull with force. Kind of ironic. Nepal Restaurant.

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Reader Comments (2)

Aspen spin has assessed the two weeks of an Aspen Christmas perfectly. Not to many places you can wake up in the morning to the smell of jet fuel and rub elbows with billionaires on the slopes and in the restaurants, if your lucky to get a reservation.

I know for me this time really keeps me out of Aspen and confined to the slopes of Snowmass teaching for the duration of this Christmas onslaught of the privileged and beautiful people.

I hope you went to Target before November 27th.

December 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDon Jewkes

thanks Don. i went after the credit card issues were discovered...but before they announced... hopefully missed out on the fraud.

December 30, 2013 | Registered CommenterAspen Spin

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